They weren’t exactly founts of information, those boys of his. Not-females that they were, there was much about their day that a mother didn’t learn, not unless she asked. Now, according to The Reluctant Interviewee, I was Barbara Walters, digging for the scoop.
As it turned out, it was a whole lot of fun, interviewing the author from New York. Interestingly, she’d lived in Goshen as a girl. She’d attended Goshen College as a young woman, and she’d delivered The Goshen News as an adolescent. That’s what I learned by asking questions.
I couldn’t help noting several things during my visit with Ms. Hess. For one thing, she talked. Unlike the conversations with Mr. Schrock’s kids, she used words. With several syllables.
There was no grunting during the entire 30 minutes. No “good” or “fine” in response to my questions. If talking with my crowd was a one-sided badminton tournament, speaking with her was a full-on tennis match. And that was fun.
Now that I know I can do it, I can’t help wondering what’s next. Where can a small-town “Barbara Walters” with a knack for debating (read “arguing”) find her niche?
Off the top of my curly head, there is one place that comes to mind. The stakes, I know, are high. My knees are green Jell-O at the thought. Only love of country and a desire to help my fellow Americans could make me say yes. And that, my friends, is at the presidential debates.
You heard me. Send a mom in there with just the right skills, and you’ll get some answers. Put her in as moderator, and she’ll cut through the smoke and find the bottom line.
Vague, non-answers and talking in circles won’t work, not on a mother who can wrangle the truth out of short felons in blue jeans with her eyes shut. Even presidential candidates are no match for a mother’s built-in radar. Shoot ‘em the Look of Death, and they’ll sing like canaries and tell what they’re really up to. I can do this.
We moms, we’re used to dog and pony shows performed by the best in the business. Living in a big, white house or a smaller governor’s mansion doesn’t make you better at it than the locals who live with me. That, you can take to the bank.
I don’t really want to do it, but if Bob Schieffer comes down with a cold or Candy Crowley gets a migraine, I’d have to say yes. All for the love of my country, of course.