And it came to pass in those days that there went out a decree (OK, an invitation) from Mrs. Schrock that all the world — wait. That certain members of the Tribe of Schrock should be fed. And all went up to be fed, every one into that one city wherein dwelt the clan’s host family.
Some went up from Middlebury out of the county of Elkhart into the village of Wakarusa while others went up from the not-quite-a-village of Honeyville. And they gathered around a solid oak dining room table wherein had been added six of the available 12 leaves.
Some of those assembled gave thanks that they were not great with child this time or about to be delivered. Others gave thanks that no fun taxes had been levied (yet), and together they offered up heartfelt gratitude for all of the Lord’s blessings and for the feast that had been provided.
Many preparations had been made in advance of the day’s bounty. The morning preceding the feast, the Cooking Mother had roasted two fair fowl rubbed with sundry herbs and spices for a grand total of 37 pounds of juicy, seasoned meat. And mentioned it to her family and friends on a social networking utility never conceived of in the days of Caesar Augustus.
At mention of the total, gasps went up in towns and cities around the country, causing one friend from the sovereign state of Georgia to inquire as to whether every family member got his own bird. To which Cooking Mother replied in the negative and affirmed her tribe’s affinity for any and all leftovers involving the aforementioned fair fowl.
For potatoes awash in seasoned gravy. For bread, homemade, and salads. For green bean and sweet potato casseroles, the traveling and hosting Schrocks gave thanks and passed their plates for seconds.
So it was that while they were there, the days were accomplished that the pies (three kinds) should be delivered. And the Hosting Mother brought them forth, swaddling them in layers of whipping cream, and laid them on the table because there was no room for them in the refrigerator. And the glory of the Lord came upon them, and the multitude of the not-so-heavenly hosts praised God, saying, “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth, peace, goodwill to men.” Then, with “hallelujahs” and “praise the Lord’s” on their lips, they dug in and laid waste to Aunt Iola’s pies.
Now there were in the same country parents abiding on The Three, keeping watch over their flock by night. And it came to pass as the visiting family members were gone away from them, that the three eldest sheep approached them.